STOP BEING EMOTIONAL!

ii've known many times that ii shouldnt be emotional when talking biz! hahas! it seems like ii keep failing to harden my heart and block all negativities! maybe ii should constantly remind myself that the more emotional ii become, the more he'll be happy. hahas! yeahs! ii've never won him in the first place. he's a con man. how can ii win a con man? it'll end up like me fighting against a pig. lol!
no doubt, ii always feel he is a great friend no matter how pple shun him, they just dunt understand him. but ii guess ii am just deceiving myself, being naive to be implicated into his world. cos he is treating me worst than how he treat his friends! and worst of all worst is, he is affecting pple around me.

my philosophy from nic ho:
dun't make ur problems become my problems bcos ii wont make my problems yours too!

ii feel it is so right! but in this trait, its all about helping thus ii cant leave him alone. yet it hurts whenever we have groupings, he start to ask things which ii have told him before but he didnt listen, pple asking whats wrong with him, he say joycelyn lo, asking me for things like as if ii owe him and now making me feel ii am not that good joycelyn ii used to be anymore! ii feel like running away and if not bcos of obligations, trust me, ii will run away! its damn tiring to go office everyday and pple start looking at me as if ii am really that bad. who can ii rely on except myself?

when ii just started, ii didnt have proper trainings too. ii just did what henri asked me to do.. did uu? did uu listen to me to go for groupings/de-brief? no! so SHUT UP! ii am sick and tired of this emotional straints. if uu still treat me as your "best friend" please, know ur limits, know everyone limits. uu can act in front of others bcos they dunt know uu. ii dont care.. to me, uu have lied to me many times thinking that ii didnt know. its not ii dunt know. its ii pretend not to know cos ii wanted to trust uu time and time again. Read back ur post and tell me, its fake right? yeah! cos ii felt it is. convince me to go back? PUii! its lucky that ii didnt give up bcos ii will be so stupid giving up everything just bcos of uu! WHY? cos ii have seen the real YOU!

its really tired being nice to uu know bcos uu'll just take it for granted.

THEREFORE II HAVE SUMMARISE EVERYTHING AND DECIDED NEVER TO TREAT UU WARMLY AGAIN. II CANT AFFORD TO TAKE THE RISK BECOS II AM STILL 50% SELF-CONSCIOUS AND II CAN DO EXTREME THINGS UU WILL NEVER WANT ME TO DO TOWARDS YOU. II MEAN IT! STOP MAKING ME GIVE UP ON UU BECAUSE WE'RE FRIENDS!

uu have ur faults and ii have mine too. no one is perfect so stop being so 38 spreading negative things abt me if uu dunt want me to spread negative things abt uu! period! if uu keep looking at faults to pick at, uu will not be successful in anything because ur ur EQ is not there!

ps: EQ is more important than IQ. act smart no use. its how uu handle problems!