iim grateful for whatever uu did.

so many things happened during the last 4days. october is really not a good month.
ii really wish all these aint happening. sometimes ii feel like ending all these. many a times ii felt useless.

we tried our very best to be strong in front of each other especially him - keeping all the sorrows to himself,not wanting to worry me. ii felt useless not being able to help him and ii really wish ii could read his mind. ii hate seeing him keeping things to himself, yet ii cant do anything cos ii know he did all these for me, for be to stay blissful.

iim very afraid he will break down and ii cant afford to see him breakdown.
he's my one and only support, the only person ii wunt have social phobic with.
thus iim very grateful for whatever he has done for me over the past 8years,treating me differently from how he treat others. ii felt it and appreciates it yet can he feel my gratefulness?